Ok so this awesome Momma blogger, Kristen, that I follow put up an awesome post about feeling shame for having a good marriage, and you can read that bad boy here. But I thought that I'd put a plug in on my little corner because I'm feeling it.
I feel the awkwardness of talking to people about our marriage. Where I am so excited to talk about being with my best friend but I tend to draw back because I know we haven't had the hardships that someone else has.
But when people call us naive or they say, "Just you wait" or tell us we are in the honeymoon stage still, I'm tired of it. We have only been married 2 1/2 years but my hubs and I work hard for our marriage and we shouldn't have to feel ashamed to talk about how great it is for us.
Yeah, we haven't gone through the really hard stuff but that doesn't mean that we haven't had difficulties. Anytime you bring two sinners from two different backgrounds you will have struggles. But that does not mean that it's impossible to work through them. I've seen good and bad marriages, I watched my parents get divorced, and I watched my grandmother hold my grandfather's hand until the very end. I've listened to the testimonies of friends whose marriages went to the cliff and by God's grace they worked through it! So I'm not naive, I know it can be hard, but I also know that a good solid marriage is possible, and we shouldn't be resigned to expecting the worst.
Now I'm not saying that I have it all figured out, and that we won't have any troubles, because the Lord knows Matt and I will hurt and disappoint each other, but we stand together every step of the way and the longer we are together the more I am amazed and humbled by the man that I married. I love knowing that I don't have to worry if he will leave me and he doesn't have to worry about me leaving him because divorce is not an option for us. We chose while engaged that divorce was off the table, and that forces us to stop and talk things out.
We don't go and rant and rave to other people, we don't keep a list of things the other person has done wrong, we try our best to be understanding when the other person is having an "off" day. Most importantly though, we both seek Jesus. We learned a lot of great tools while we were going through premarital counseling, but can I be honest? Nothing compares to both of you working hard to seek Jesus and put the other person first.
So the next time someone asks you how your marriage is doing, allow yourself some joy to erupt there lady, because whether you have been married decades or days, have been through the valley of death or are walkin on sunshine, your marriage is something you should be happy about. And I can guarantee you that you won't be the only one feeling shameless about your great marriage.
I know I will be.
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